When we shouldn’t and should trust the body’s wisdom: Procrastination is helping you!
We often say we can trust the body’s wisdom. And that is mostly true. But sometimes the body gets it wrong. Here is a small excerpt from Eugene Gendlin’s Focusing book that explores this. You’ll find it on pages 87-88 of the 2007 version:
“In focusing you will often find that some words, which come with a strong sense of rightness at a given moment and give you a body shift, are later superseded by what comes at a later step. You cannot—and should not—trust any single set of words, any one feeling, any one body-message that comes. But you can definitely trust the whole series of steps by which your body moves to resolve and change a wrong state of being. You can trust that, even if the words and understanding of a given step are superseded, that step was the right step to come then, at that moment, and will lead to the right next step from there.”
When I cross this passage with parts work, I can see that we often have protective parts that feel right. They are familiar and therefore comfortable. They can be the parts that tell us we should do or not do something—often as reactions or impulses. But then if we focus on the broader situation and allow a felt sense to form of all that related to the should, we can have a new perspective come, sometimes from a new part, or our perspective of that part shifts as it gains a wider or different perspective.
From a polyvagal theory perspective, the original familiar feeling of so-called rightness could be faulty neuroception. This is when our autonomic nervous system unconsciously assesses a risk to be there and triggers a defensive state when there is no danger and the situation is actually safe. Our bodies are telling us we should react to something that isn’t there. If you’re Focusing on something and gaining clarity, we often learn more about the old way of seeing something before we get a new way. We get a felt shift in knowing oh, that’s what I’ve been doing. The shift is in knowing ourselves, and that is what causes the carrying forward.
To break this down, Focusing practice helps us assess the situation differently in a few steps. First we notice what will become the old way of viewing the situation (the step that will turn out to be superseded) by gaining clarity of how we have been acting or viewing the world. And eventually—maybe during a future Focusing session—we gain a new way forward, and in so doing retune our nervous systems. We notice we are in the present moment, and how things really are now, and a different way of being and action steps emerge from this new perspective.
When we should listen to our procrastination
Other times, we have the opposition situation. Our bodies are telling us we should not do something and our minds think we should. We think our bodies are wrong, but in fact the body wanting to procrastinate, for example, in that situation is a good think. The body is telling us we have time and would be better served doing something else. Maybe we need rest. A change of scenery. A walk!
As someone who has often had a very busy work schedule managing multiple simultaneous projects, having some more time in my schedule lately led to more procrastination. At first, I was concerned. Where had my work drive gone? But then with Focusing I saw that this step of taking it easier was the step needed to create more space for creative endeavours that I’ve been longing for. It felt uncomfortable to have time and to not be immediately tackling the next thing on my to do list. It was unfamiliar to no longer always be in busy mode, but busy was no longer helpful. It didn’t create the space to create a safer and more alive and fulfilling life.
Ironically, some of these insights came while filming a Focusing video for the Learning Lab at Stanford University about dealing with procrastination. It is titled Getting Unstuck and includes working through procrastination or other creative blocks in order to get into action on a project. The video is mostly a Focusing exercise, for your body wisdom to guide you forward. You can watch it below.
When procrastination is a sign of faulty neuroception
Of course, not all procrastination is the result of simply having enough time to do something later, and having more urgent needs that need taking care of. Sometimes, our procrastination is a sign that a part of us is worried about our ability to do the task well. Or what people will think. Or if we’ll come to regret our work in the future. Etc.
When our procrastination is telling us we don’t believe in ourselves, then it is time to look at our neuroception and self-image. It is likely that we are viewing ourselves through the lens of who we used to be, rather than who we are now or who we are becoming! One of the metaphors I like to think about is that given that part of a butterfly remembers being a caterpillar, that the first time a butterfly flies, it probably thinks that it can’t. It’s whole system hasn’t caught up that it can now fly—it has wings!
So there is a fear wall, you could call it a terror barrier, to break though. The part of us that takes us through that fear is the new us. The us we are becoming or want to be. In so doing, we update our nervous systems that there is a part of us that can do this. And with those successful experiences, overtime, the fear slips away and we can just do that new thing regularly.
As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”
So what are you waiting for? If you’ve had the idea, it likely means it is a step for you along your path, or at least a step to bringing you to your ultimate goal. Whether that be to dive into Focusing and really get to know yourself, or take action on an idea you already have, now may be just the time to take that right next step.